We need an app for this

With apologies to Alfred, Lord Tennyson, it’s June, when a young man’s (or woman’s, or sexually indeterminate person’s) fancy lightly turns to thoughts of nontraditional “love” of any variety expressed by the ever-growing LGBTTQQIAAP alphabet soup. In downtown Washington it’s impossible to swing a cat without hitting a rainbow flag or a “Pride” enthusiast.If anyone was under the impression that established religion was a thing of the past in secular, postmodern societies, he, she, it, they, ze, sie, hir, co, or ey are mistaken. There is in fact an official religion of the “democratic” West, and LGBT++ etcetera is it.

So, take your smart phone, and when meeting someone, the smart phones can chat and identify which of the various colors and genders the counter party will be, today.  The app will also identify the which of the six or seven bathrooms has the fixture to accommodate one's particular stance.